Bummed for no good reason

I don't know why I am so bummed out as I have a lot to be thankful for. I saw the surgeon today, and we have to go to Plan B for the incision area that is not healing. Evidently there is a big cavity under the skin that keeps filling up with yukky fluid. Most of the incision is healing fine but the central area where the skin was most affected by the radiation treatment is not closed and is draining. The surgeon says I need a wound vac for 6 to 8 weeks so I am really bummed out. I don't think it hurts, but I will have to have Home Health Care come out ever three days and do whatever it is they do. It is sort of like a drain with sucking action that keeps the cavity empty and closed, (this is my very uneducated layman's perception) so the area under the skin will grow back together. I think I will be able to travel and get back to work, but I will have to carry the thing around with me clipped at my waist -- hopefully under my skirt. The other thing I am bummed about is that I will have to have 2 more chemo sessions. I knew all along this would be necessary, but now that I have heard it for sure, I am disappointed. I hate the idea of maybe having a port again and for having two 4-day (although mine were always 5 days as I always needed fluid and potassium on the 5th day) sessions, losing my hair all over again etc. I do not meet with the chemo Doc until the 13th. I dont' want to start chemo until the first week in Sept so I am hoping they will let me do that. I have been off chemo since mid April so I doubt holding off a couple of weeks will hurt. I just hope they see things the same way.

Anyway, I just really got upset by both these things today, and I am not sure why. They are so insignificant based on what I have been through so I don't know why they are bothering me so much. Seems like pretty stupid things to be upset about, but I am. I know I will get over it in a couple of hours, but in the meantime, I am angry.

Otherwise the surgeon was happy with my progress, and I don't see him again for 4 weeks. S let me go have a quick pity party, and I will be okay in a couple of hours!